Love Is a Verb

Love is a verb. It isn’t just a feeling or something that happens to us—rather, it’s an action word. Love is something we do.[1] The New Testament teaches this principle: love is found and demonstrated through action.

John the Beloved wrote, “Let us not love in word, neither in tongue; but in deed and in truth.”[2] Paul the Apostle also wrote about charity—a pure love—and how this divine attribute surpasses all other virtues. This pure love, he taught, acts with patience. It shows kindness. It resists jealousy, avoids self-glorification, and chooses humility. It treats others with respect, seeks the welfare of others, exercises restraint, forgives freely, and celebrates goodness.[3]

Love is both extended and received through our choices and actions. These choices not only help us to find love but also to strengthen it. Love is a decision, a choice[4]—a choice we make every day.I know of a great love story. I might call it one of the greatest love stories never told. Many years ago, a man and woman decided to marry. They had many happy years together until, life wasn’t so happy. A decision had to be made: would they stay together or go their separate ways? The couple decided that everything they had built together was worth saving. And so they worked together to stay together. They chose to love.

Month after month, they patiently served one another, showing kindness in their interactions. Year after year, they humbly and freely forgave. They spent more time together and found joy in simple things. Love became an action word. Eventually, laughter replaced tears and smiles replaced fears. Today, their marriage is strong, bright, and full of joy. Few knew of the quiet decision they made—to choose to love—but everyone could see the results of that choice. Love stories like theirs are not often told, but they exemplify true love.

Yes, we choose to love—because love is a verb.

References:[1] See Stephen R. Covey, The Seven Habits of Highly Effective People: 25th Anniversary Edition (2013), 87-88.[2] 1 John 3:18.[3] See 1 Corinthians 13:4–8.[4] For a comprehensive review on this thought, see Lynn G. Robbins, Love Is a Choice: Making Your Marriage and Family Stronger(2015).